I write "you're beautiful" on the backs of my business cards.

New post! Oh my god it's been like a few days. I've been slacking. Usually there are like fifteen posts per week but I'm so busy fucking working that there just is no time! I'm sorry for all of you who are faithful to my writing. It surely needs to stop. I kind of have no excuse because I was off yesterday but I just laid in my bed all day long yesterday and I didn't do much except for going upstairs to get an achievement by eating a couple sandwiches. Sometimes you just need those days where you're just like, "Blah I need to fucking rest!" This was the case with me.

Aside from over-dramatics that are happening with former loves in my life, I suppose nothing really is going on. Currently I have someone in my life who has a tendency to utterly take my breath away but for the moment we've reached a stalemate where things can't go any further than they have despite our growing emotions. Things need to happen and they WILL happen. We just have to give it some time I guess. Nothing good ever comes easy and I've got my regrets about holding back in the past but I feel free now. I feel like I'm cutting that rope that is tied to the dock and I'm ready to just float with the current.

I've been reading a lot of articles lately about the existence of God. I've come to the conclusion that no one in the world has the capability to perceive and therefore prove (or disprove) the existence of God. Not even if you took every single one of our minds and put them together. So basing your idea that God does or doesn't exist based on scientific knowledge is absurd. Basing the idea that God exists based on religious views is also absurd. But I do believe that there is a part of us, written by design, that is based on God. It's higher than our own consciousness and it's something that we as human beings cannot understand. I think of God metaphorically as this all-powerful (by our standards but not by his own) artist and architect and when you think about it (if you're an artist you know this) an artist's masterpieces are almost always a reflection of themselves. If your art could think for itself, you wouldn't have to make it because it would just make itself and overthrow your idea which is what we're incapable of. If we could perceive the being that created up, we'd be breaking a fourth wall. It's beyond all concept, beyond all faith and certainly beyond all reason. But that's not to say that the morals written in religious works aren't fairly accurate. But these are common sense. This is right and wrong as it's been conceived since the beginning of time. It doesn't take a fool to know that, which is why it's so universally accepted.

You can take a photo. But a photo cannot take you.

I downloaded Pokemon: The First Movie just for the fact that I wanted to watch something where Mewtwo is an asshole to everyone. It doesn't matter though because he was treated like shit too when he was born so he had a right to, you know? He just doesn't take any goddamn shit from anyone and I really admire that! Mewtwo really, even still I think, is the strongest Pokemon. If I can recall, he can learn any moves just like Mew and his elemental (psychic) stats are through the fucking roof. It isn't really evil, it's just misunderstood and it misunderstands the human population. I think that he is probably the most psychologically deep character in the Pokemon universe. Everything else is either cute as fuck of brutal.

I need cigarettes (smoke them I mean) and I need to drink about a gallon more of coffee before lunch so I have enough energy that I won't crash in the day eventually. I'm probably going to Country Fair to get a sandwich for lunch today and I'll probably see Hannah Brown's sister there because from what I have seen she works there a lot.

I'm going to write more later for sure because I have stuff to talk about. I just need to take a break from typing for a hot minute.