My defective alarm clock.

This is between you and I because we need to keep this on the down-low. If my alarm clock heard me talking about it in a despicable manner than he would likely castrate me in my sleep. I am reliant on a piece of shit to wake me up in a punctual manner in the morning, a task which it seems to fail me on every time.

I roll out of bed running for the bathroom to take a shower. There is no "I'm up early! I'm going to go outside and sit on the deck with a nice cup of coffee and a morning cigarette while I check out the newspaper with the radio on." No. It's more like this:

*YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWN"

"What time is it?" *Checks clock* "MOOOOOTHERFUCKER!"

It's been a while since I've woken up to that "BEEP BEEP BEEP" noise on repeat. Most people hate that sound but I rejoice whenever I hear it in the morning. I can't even move myself to hitting the snooze button. I'm like "WOW IT WORKED!" This occurs once every two months.

Because Tito... yes, that is the name of my scum-fuck alarm clock is all like:

"YO DANIELLLLL JOO NEED TO SET ME BEFORE JOO GO TO SLEEEPYBYE!" And I'm like "Alright, you're Mexican. Taco Bell is Mexican, Corona is Mexican, Tequila is Mexican and Chihuahuas are Mexican. I can trust you." But no. FUCK THAT. This is one of those bad Mexican dudes with the creepy curly mustache and a thirst for blood.

So I'm tormented with the idea that if I set it, MAYBE it'll wake me up in the morning. Again, this is rare but I try really hard. I inspect it from top to bottom before I set it back down on my end table to make sure everything is in right and working order. I've even changed the batteries. But nothing works.

I'm fighting a war against my stupid fucking alarm clock and I am losing.

UNICORNSSS!

I'm not convinced that unicorns don't exist. Well, they might be extinct, but I don't think that they never existed. Why? Because of their magical horns. In order to fully utilize the magical horn, you needed to grind it up into dust. That's why there are so many fossils of dead horses and not unicorns. Who wouldn't want to have magical unicorn horn dust? You'd be out of your mind to not want that!

I talk to Katie all day every day now and I think it's whats keeping me sane anymore because I'm sort of in a slump and a bad position because I want to get out on my own. I NEED to get out on my own but right now it's not a possibility because I don't have the money or a stable enough job to support myself. I feel like the longer I stay with my parents (or my dad and his girlfriend), the more and more I get in the way of things. So I try to avoid them because I feel guilty. But then I get shit for it.

Oh yeah... Pegasus is dead. Yeah. Believe it. There was only one and no, you can't have one. I wish I could though. You have no idea how much pussy a winged horse could get you! That's so fucking elegant!

The playlist consists of music that I listened to when I was in high school. Even earlier than that actually. I miss when Hydra Head and Drive-Thru actually had good bands on their rosters. I don't miss Victory records at all. They can go fuck themselves. But Hydra Head, Equal Vision, and Drive Thru... pretty much ruled my fucking life. Tooth and Nail too. And THEY even suck now. But they have Solid State which is pretty legit. FUCK RISE RECORDS. Ugh...

I was looking up what it would take to build a real gundam. And I was surprised to find that all of the technology that would be required to do it actually exists. Maybe not the "Phase Shift" armor from SEED, but all the other practical stuff. I don't think that they would ever build a nuclear-powered exoskeleton though. They'd have to build something with a battery that can hold a ton of power. I'd also think that they would make them smaller too due to them being easier to manuever and everything. Plus the propulsion system would be ungodly.

Anyways... I'm going back to bed. So I can dream of unicorns.